The aftermath

We are now into a regular monthly routine with my cancer treatments. Near the end of each month, I go for blood tests whereby the primary goal is to evaluate my PSA level, followed a few days later by an appointment with my Urologist to go over the blood test results. If the results are OK, I continue with my monthly Firmagon injections into my stomach (which hurts like hell for the first week and beyond!). My PSA was 1,060 back in November, but went down to 41.1 in December, 1.0 in January, and now, down to 0.95 in February. It needs to be 1.0 or lower so this is great news. As I mentioned before, this treatment is not a long-term solution, so the hope is to have it work for as long as possible before "Plan B" is put into action - but so far, so good. Also my back pain has been much better lately as I've been put on a different pain medication.

I feel like the month of February represents the aftermath of a hurricane - when the smoke and dust settles and you see clearly the result of the devastation.

Ever since this ordeal began in October, things happened quickly and we were busy with appointments, the holidays, visits, our trip to Europe - and believe it or not there didn't seem to be a lot of time to really sit back and reflect. In the month of February, I kept a relatively low profile, getting back into work as best I could, but also made lots of time to myself to think and evaluate the "aftermath".

Remember back in my very first blog, I wrote about how I refuse to ask “why me?” - refuse to feel sorry for myself - refuse to ask “why this again?” - well, lately I’ve been doing a lot of “asking” and feeling sorry for myself. Not sure if it’s the weather, lack of sunlight, or perhaps some kind of inevitable delayed reaction. I imagine that a lot of this has to do with the drugs. The Dexamethasone I was on back then gave me bouts of euphoria (sometimes followed closely by bouts of depression), and it seems that my current box of drugs does not seem to have as much of a positive effect, but more of a "downer".

One of the things that makes this tough is the fact that I can’t do everything that I was able to do before. I can’t drive. I can’t run my kids’ hockey team practice (can’t even get on skates). I can’t lift things, can’t do basic things around the house that I used to do. It makes you feel rather useless most of the time which is not a good feeling.

I feel this overwhelming desire to do "something". Back in October of 2014 I went to Lesotho, Africa with an amazing group of people through the organization Bracelet of Hope, and found it to be an extremely rewarding experience. I'm in the process of speaking to a few people to see if a return trip to Lesotho is feasible and worthwhile. I've already put the bug in Kathryn's ear . . .

I've been thinking a lot lately about what to say to my kids. Right now, they know daddy has been sick and is now recovering, but in case things start to go the other way, I feel the need to be prepared on how to explain things to them in the best possible way. This is the main thing that's been on my mind lately, and something that's been bothering me quite a bit. I saw a therapist a couple of weeks ago that was available through the Grand River Cancer Centre, and this was the first step in learning and figuring a few of these things out.

In the meantime, I'm looking forward to some sunshine in March, the March break vacation with Kat and the kids, and hopefully being able to do more such as taking the kids to school and activities.

February was good, March is going to be even better!

The new normal

I’ve been getting some comments and complaints from friends and family that they haven’t heard from me in a while and that I haven’t been posting updates to my blog as frequently as before. Yes, that’s true and I apologize. I tend to write more when I’m feeling good and drop off a bit when I’m not feeling so good. The last few weeks have been hard but I’m optimistic that things are going well so far and will slowly get better.

I received more blood results last week and my PSA is down to 1 so this is good news. In fact it couldn't be better. That means that the hormone-based cancer treatment that Dr. M has me on is working. I’ve gone from PSA 1,060 in November to 41 in December, and now down to 1. Although this is great news, keep in mind that this particular treatment is not a cure, and usually only works for between 2 and 4 years on average. Eventually, the cancer will “outsmart” it and we will then have to go to another treatment, such as chemotherapy or other.

I’ve been told there is no cure for what I have, particularly since it has spread (metastasis) and gone into my bones and spine, so the best they can do is to come up with ways of prolonging my life as much as possible. There are new discoveries and treatments coming out every day, and I’ve looked into a great many alternatives as suggested by friends and family so it’s a matter of keeping at it.

I received some really nice news last week. I met with Kathleen Buckley, a Genetics specialist at the Grand River Cancer Centre. She went through my family medical history with me, and then was able to connect me with a group in Toronto at Sunnybrook Hospital that are doing a cancer research study. She thought that my situation might be perfect for what they are currently working on, so I was able to meet with them last week at Sunnybrook to get things started. I’m so grateful to Kathleen - there always seems to be someone out there looking out for me.

The world of genetics is a really fascinating area and must be a very interesting field to work in. Over the next few weeks, the team at Sunnybrook will be performing some tests on me to see if I have a specific genetic mutation and if so, I may be eligible to try these new drugs they are working with which they’ve had success with so far. It’s all new and experimental, but I’m very happy to have been included in this because it can’t hurt and at this point anything new is always worth a try!

I’ve slowly been getting accustomed to my “new normal”. The back pain is still there although over the past 5 days it seems to be slowly getting better. I’m hopeful that this will continue and that I will not require surgery for my spinal compression fracture. I’m also trying to get used to the fatigue that comes with the cancer medication, and this one is also tough to deal with. Sometimes I have to force myself to wake up otherwise I could sleep all day. I need to kick myself in the butt - accept it, get used to it, and deal with it! I’m getting frequent “hot flashes”, a side effect of the cancer medication, which my Urologist compares to what women go through during menopause, and have been given yet another drug to deal with it. These things combined have brought me down a bit over the past few weeks but as I mentioned before I am optimistic that the month of February will be better!

Last Saturday, my 6-year old daughter Anika performed at Van Gogh’s Ear, a local restaurant/pub here in Guelph through her music school, Jam School. When her teacher Mikaela first mentioned it I wasn’t too sure she was ready. She has been playing piano for a couple of years, but only started the voice lessons with Mikaela at Jam School a couple of months ago. She really believed in her and was confident that she could do it. Mikaela is awesome!!

Anika performed the song “Feel the Light” by Jennifer Lopez (from the movie “Home”), playing the piano and singing (solo). When she was finished, I became very emotional, not just because she played well, but just the fact that she had the courage at age 6 to get up there and perform with such confidence in front of such a large group of people, and even work through a couple of minor errors just like she was taught to do (just keep going!).

Kathryn and both kids have really inspired me and despite the odds, despite the discomfort, I am ready to work through and just keep on going just like Anika did last Saturday afternoon on the Van Gogh stage!

I’m hoping to get out more in the month of February and am currently working on arranging that music night I promised a few weeks back - so stay tuned. Once again, thanks to all my family and friends for all your amazing support. I’m still enjoying that cooler full of frozen food and restaurant gift certificates that my good friends at Manulife gave to me a few weeks ago, and as always, appreciate everyone’s kindness and concern.

Here’s to an amazing month of February!!!

My inspiration: Anika performing at Van Gogh’s Ear in Guelph on Saturday, January 28

 

A new year

We've just returned from our Europe vacation and it was everything we hoped it would be and more. After spending Christmas with both families first in Richmond Hill then Montreal, we boarded our plane for Europe during a crazy Quebec storm 3 hours late and barely made our connection flight through London! It was quite the adventure running through Heathrow airport with the kids with collective hearts pounding. Amazingly, we got on our connection flight to Zagreb, Croatia with mere minutes to spare - and even more incredible, our luggage arrived as well!

Our first stop was Cakovec, Croatia and the kids were amazed at how many "cousins" there were to meet. At each visit the kids didn't want to leave (a sure sign they were having a good time), it was great fun and we were welcomed and treated like royalty. Thanks so much to everyone for making our visit so memorable. I'm proud of my family in Croatia and you were all amazing especially Pero and Zeljka for co-ordinating all our visits with relatives and making our trip perfect! Kathryn was also great with booking and arranging everything.

Next was Zurich, Switzerland, a city I've been to many times and always loved. We spent New Years Eve and a relaxing 4 days there. Zurich is a beautiful, clean city and it was nice spending some time there.

Finally, we arrived in Paris and Anika was able to fulfill her dream of seeing the Eiffel Tower and she was not to be disappointed. We had a fantastic lunch in the Eiffel Tower restaurant something we will always remember. It was a lot of fun exploring Paris with the kids and showing them how fun and interesting it can be to explore a new country and city. We got a tour of the Louvre and explored Montmartre and Sacré Coeur Basilica.

It was nice to see our kids enjoy and appreciate the same things that we do such as the great food of Paris. Every restaurant, pastry shop, and coffee shop was fantastic!

Although we did have a great time and enjoyed it very much, it was a challenge for me at times. The current cancer medications that I am on make me very drowsy and being off the Dexamethasone has been a factor. The back pain is unbearable at times as I'm sometimes unable to walk because of my spinal compression fracture, but hopefully this will soon be rectified or at least alleviated upon my return.

Before I left I received good news as my PSA levels are down from over 1,000 to 40 which means the cancer medications are working so far. The bad news is that if the back pain persists then I will require surgery.

It was an emotional roller coaster ride with fatigue, depression and pain mixed in with a truly memorable experience with my family. It was great to see our kids enjoy travel as much as Kathryn and I do. It was fun doing simple things like spending time together talking, learning, taking photographs, and laughing.

As the saying goes "nothing worthwhile is easy". As hard as it was at times physically for me, it was an experience we will never forget so well worth it.

In terms of cancer treatment, the plan is to continue on the current path using hormone-based drugs and injections and monitor the results. Prostate cancer cells feed on testosterone so that is the current plan, and there is no telling how long this can be effective so we need to just re-evaluate and adjust the strategy as we go. 

Despite the persistent fatigue and chronic back pain, I am still optimistic and am enjoying each day as it comes. It's amazing how small things can bring you joy: watching your kids get excited about exploring a new city, seeing them using the french they've learned in school by ordering in a Parisian restaurant (and see how much the waiter/waitress appreciate this!), watching them take turns playing songs on the piano with cousins they've just met, and just seeing them enjoy life because that's what it's all about in the end. This was my 4th visit to Paris but by far the most important and memorable.

At this point I just need to focus on what I need to do to get better. I admit it's not always easy to remain positive and I've definitely had my moments. I'm not going to lie, the last few weeks have been tough.

As I look out the window of the airplane on our flight home from Paris - Toronto, I think about how lucky I've been to have travelled to so many countries - almost 40 in total - for both work and play. As I gaze out the window, Shayne points to the gorgeous sky and yells out "look out there it's amazing daddy get the camera out right now". All I can do is smile and feel incredibly happy and proud.

 The view from the Eiffel Tower in Paris, France

Right here, right now

Last night I watched the short documentary film “Cristina” on Netflix, the story about an amazing 37-year old woman with cancer and her ongoing battle with the disease. Although our cancers and situations are quite different, I could still however relate to much of what Cristina went through each step of the way in her journey, and of course, was pulling for her right until the end in her courageous battle.

Cristina made some very powerful and meaningful observations and quotes which I could relate to and that really inspired me.

“Every day counts. The blessing of cancer is living right now. It’s almost like the closer you are to dying the more alive you become, and that to me is really the truth”

After watching this film, I began to once again think about the concept of “enjoying the moment”, something that I have thought long and hard about particularly in the past six years since surviving my heart incident against those crazy odds.

It’s easy to say things like “enjoy life”, “enjoy the moment”, “love your family”, and “appreciate what you have” - but actually “living it” is much more difficult and something that we don’t always do. It shouldn’t have to be this way. Sometimes we may feel guilty about perhaps not always “living” this way in our daily lives, but the fact is that our lives are busy and we are constantly under pressure at work, at home, and within our family/children and relationships. It’s not always easy to just sit back, take a deep breath, and slow things down and enjoy the moment. This is perhaps where yoga and meditation comes in. I started getting back into yoga a few weeks ago and it’s helped a lot.

It’s unfortunate that in today’s society we tend to measure a lot of things in dollars, but this is the world we live in. Particularly when we compare different jobs, job titles, levels, careers, we always tend to look at the hourly wage or annual salary. Satisfaction and time don’t seem to fare into it as much, yet these are factors that greatly contribute to whether you find happiness or misery in your work, and whichever that is, it trickles down into every aspect of your everyday life.

Many years ago I left a fairly stressful but high paying job for a lower paying, low stress job, one that allowed me to work regular (normal) hours, something I hadn’t done for many years. I came to realize how important it was to have that stress removed, and to have all that extra time to be able to do things that were previously not possible. It definitely allowed me to have a look at things from a completely different perspective, and to subsequently become aware and have an appreciation of a different way of measuring and prioritizing what is important in life.

Right at the very end of the documentary film, Cristina talks about how she feels that perhaps her purpose in life was to tell people to “Wake Up”. In her own words:

“Tomorrow is never really there, yesterday is definitely gone. So right now is the only gift you have and that is what you have to share with everybody”

As I watched the film last night, I hoped for a happy ending. I was somehow thinking that it might end with Cristina beating the disease. I realize of course that at these stages you can’t ever beat it as becomes an ongoing, lifelong battle, but I was still hoping that it would end on some sort of a positive note.

Sadly, Cristina Weigmann lost her battle with cancer 5 months after her second cancer diagnosis (she initially had breast cancer and it returned). Doctors had initially told her that she could have years to live, which gave her hope, but it was not meant to be. I’ve also had a number of different opinions and prognosis over the past few weeks but it’s one of those things that you can’t rely on or think about too much, particularly since the variables seem to change almost daily. The best you can do is to remain positive and optimistic and hope for the best.

Cristina's life and words have inspired me and will have a lasting impact. She is 100% right, all we have is “Right here, right now”.

Tomorrow I will have my blood test which will determine whether my cancer treatments have been effective or not, and I will likely know the results next Wednesday. The best case scenario would be that my PSA levels have dropped significantly in response to the cancer medications and that the current method is working. So, as per usual, a few more days of waiting and suspense - something that we’ve grown accustomed to over the past couple of months.

I will keep you all posted with the latest news. In the meantime friends enjoy each moment that we have here on this earth and appreciate life, I think it's the best we can do!



Documentary: “Cristina”, Director Michèle Ohayon - http://www.cristinathemovie.com/

One day at a time

It’s always interesting to see how things can change. One day you’re up, another you’re down – one day there is good news and the next there is not so good news. The title of my last blog post was “Prognosis positive” because it was just confirmed that the root cause of the cancer was prostate, which was a much better prognosis had it been upper gastrointestinal (stomach or esophagus).

This past week I received the results of my prostate ultrasound and biopsy and the news was not so great. In terms of prostate testing, a benchmark called the Gleason Score was developed using values going up to 10. Patterns of cells in the prostate tissue are evaluated and the most common cell pattern is given a grade of 1 (most like normal cells) to 5 (most abnormal). The two most common grades are then added together to make the Gleason score.

A high Gleason score (such as 10) means a high-grade prostate tumor. High-grade tumors are more likely than low-grade tumors to grow quickly and spread. Unfortunately my Gleason score has come back as a high value of 9.

I have now been put on a combination of medication and injections to treat the cancer, and currently, these methods are being using to treat not only the prostate cancer but the cancer found in my bones and spine as well. In two weeks, my doctor will evaluate my blood PSA levels to see how I have responded to these cancer treatments so far. This will be a big test and then determine the next course of action. Hopefully I will receive an early Christmas present the week of December 19 when the results are in and hear that I am responding well to this current plan.

Over the next week I will be finally off my dreaded Dexamethasone steroid medication which is welcome news for me (and my family for that matter!). I’m hoping that after I get off this drug I will be able to drive again, work full time, and things will start to slowly get back to normal again (or as normal as they can be at this point).

Overall I feel good. It’s a nice time of year. We’ve just put up our Christmas tree and the kids are really excited about the holidays. Kathryn has booked our vacation and the plan is to spend the holidays with my family, then Kathryn’s family in Montreal, and fly to Europe and visit Croatia, Paris, France, as well as a stop in Zurich, Switzerland. We’re all really looking forward to this trip and I know that it will be something that we will never forget.

Yesterday I received a second delivery of incredible Edible Arrangements from Susan and Doug – 2 boxes worth! Both boxes were finished within 3 hours – it was actually a bit embarrassing (those chocolate covered banana things are crazy Susan I won't tell you how many I had!!) - thanks Susan and Doug it was just what the doctor ordered and thanks once again to all my friends and family for your concern and well wishes. As always it’s much appreciated and I will continue to keep you all posted with my news.

Decorating the tree

Prognosis positive

Prognosis is a medical term for predicting the probable course and likely outcome of a disease or serious medical condition. I don't envy any doctor or health care professional expected to deliver a prognosis to their patient. I've had a few different ones over the past two and half weeks, each one varied and in each instance time had elapsed, variables changed, and ultimately the prognosis changed. After many visits to the hospital, appointments and tests: CT scan, bone scan, gastroscopy, colonoscopy, ultrasound and biopsy of the prostate, it appears certain now that the root origin of my cancerous brain tumour is prostate cancer which in the opinion of the doctors is one of the best case scenarios as far as prognosis goes. So, despite the fact that it's spread to my bones and spine it’s still positive and welcome news for me!

I am a numbers kind of person. I am a programmer into statistics and analytics, and for the most part see the analysis of data as necessary and useful.

In March of this year, I purchased a FitBit fitness tracker for the main purpose of monitoring my heart rate on a more consistent basis, but after a few weeks, found that I began using the step tracker feature more. The FitBit was programmed with a default daily goal of 10,000 steps (about 7.5 km), such that if you achieve your goal, it does this little celebration for you and flashes a message of your achievement on your watch display with a slight vibration.

In the middle of April, I decided I was going to walk 10,000 steps per day for 365 straight days, regardless of the weather, regardless of how I was feeling - no matter what - 365 days of 10,000 steps or bust - just like that old postal service saying "neither rain, nor snow, nor sleet, nor hail".

Unfortunately, my FitBit streak ended at 174 days on October 4, 2016, the day my tumour emerged from behind my eye - a day that I could not get out of bed, eat, or sleep. It was a competition in a way -  with myself, but one that I was not able to achieve nor could I have ever imagined that in fact that a tumour was going to be the reason for the end of my streak and ultimate goal.

In general, I see competition as a good thing. At a young age I almost became obsessed with winning and sometimes used numbers and statistics to help achieve my goals. Embarrassingly, when I was in my 20's, I used to keep track of all my tennis scores at the club with the ultimate goal of going an entire season undefeated. I achieved this goal in the year of 1987 with 43 wins, 1 tie (due to rain), and 0 losses. Am I bragging right now - OK maybe? I’ve since matured somewhat (maybe a little), not so obsessed with necessarily winning, but still very much into the statistics and analysis.

Numbers and analysis can be a good way to help you drive and achieve goals, but numbers can also make you crazy and have a negative impact on your attitude and future.

Since this whole experience began, I’ve actually gone out of my way to avoid numbers and statistics. I’ve refrained from looking at odds, prognosis numbers and percentages particularly with so much information and misinformation out there on the internet. I look at other professions such as real estate agents or financial advisors, and the fact that every day they are out there performing analysis, making predictions, and advising clients based on the most recent data, but in the end, nobody has that crystal ball and can really know for sure as has been proven time and again.

So, it appears certain now that I have prostate cancer. Was it preventable? Should it have been detected years ago? Should I have insisted on a prostate screening back in my 40’s (I am now 52)? Do I need to warn all of my male friends in their 40's and 50's to immediately see their doctor about a prostate cancer test? These are the things that are going through my mind at this time, so I started doing some research.

I found some good and reliable medical guides on screening and tests that you should get done in each of the different phases of your life, starting in your 20’s. Of course, this list gets much longer by the time you reach your 40’s, 50’s, and beyond. The 50’s list alone includes screening for prostate cancer, screening for colon cancer with fecal occult blood testing, sigmoidoscopy, colonoscopy, screening for testicular cancer including monthly self exams, cholesterol testing, screening for type II diabetes, screening for skin cancer, oral cancer, lung cancer, sexually transmitted diseases, and believe it or not, there are more . . .

So, how do you manage this? How is it possible to keep up with all of these tests and screening? If there is any advice I can give at this point, it’s simply to make sure that you have a family doctor, work together to understand the tests and screening that can be done, and ask for help in scheduling these over the course of many years. Seeing a list like this can be overwhelming, but your doctor can be seen as your coach or manager - recommend and schedule, and help you to prioritize.

I continue to have so many memorable and meaningful experiences, and need to thank Kathryn for putting up with an almost-crazy person at times and being patient and amazing. New drugs and the mix and variations have proved challenging at times (remember, blame it on the meds?). Our kids have also been incredible. We've spoken to them about cancer and what Daddy is going through, and they are incredibly understanding and courageous and go out of their way to give me extra love and attention whenever possible.

Thanks to my neighbour Anne for that awesome pot of soup which lasted the entire week I loved it! Thanks for all the incredible visits and chats. Thanks to Elizabeth (the lady who prayed for me on the patio at Eric the Baker) who came to my house the other day to hug me and pray for me. Thanks to the cab driver who refused payment, gave me a rosary, and told me his church will be praying for me on Sunday (I had never met this man before).

Thanks for the music my good friends Jamie, Paul, George, John - we’ve had some fantastic musical moments and jams over the past two weeks and I look forward to more. The music night I previously mentioned is currently in the works and I will keep you all posted whether you want to come out to play or just watch and be with friends.

Two weekends ago my best friend/best man Joe (my twin brother different mother we are born on the same day same year!) and wife Lucy came to visit us at the cottage, and as I was standing there with both Joe and my wife Kathryn together, I came to appreciate that I was in the presence of the two people on this earth outside of my family that have had the most positive impact on my life. What a moment that was to have that realization - one of those special moments you never forget.

We still have a hurdle or two to overcome, but if all goes well this week and next, we will be planning our trip to Croatia and Paris, France. Cousin Pero: "Bookie" is on it!

Thank you so much to all my family and friends. I continue to be amazed and inspired by all of you. I am one very lucky person.

My good neighbour, Elizabeth 

Love life

My father, Anton Gal, came to Canada in the 1950s from the former Yugoslavia (Croatia) after the war along with three friends in the hopes of a new life, to one day settle in, raise a family, and make a better life for his future children and family. He spent time working hard chopping trees in northern Ontario before finding a job as a tailor at Simpsons. He met my mother a few years later, they married, and although they had no knowledge of the English language, were not highly educated or connected - through sheer hard work and dedication were able build a life in this country and in my opinion achieve the greatest of success.

My father passed away on June 29, 2009. He died in my arms. He was surrounded by family, but I was the lucky one to be able to hold him one last time as I begged him to let go and end his long suffering.

In 2004 my father was active at age 83 and walked between 8 and 10 km per day. He would stop and chat with all the neighbours and in the winter months, do his daily walk over at the local mall where he had his group of friends that he made there. We teased him about his “girlfriends” at the mall. He always had a smile on his face and spoke and got along with everyone he met.

It all started with loss of balance and then sudden falls, but over the course of 2004 and 2005, my father became unsteady and eventually had difficulty walking. Over the next 3 years, we visited many doctors and specialists, he was given countless drugs and medication, and finally diagnosed with Progressive Supranuclear Palsy (which is essentially like a slower, prolonged version of Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS - also known as Lou Gehrig's disease). He soon ended up in a wheelchair and required the help of caregivers.

Over the next couple of years we watched helplessly as he deteriorated until he finally passed away in 2009. It was an extremely difficult time for the entire family, particularly my mother and sister Sue who dedicated their lives to helping him so much in those final years, months, weeks and days. Talk about true love.

My father battled through his illness but always remained positive. We were amazed by his attitude despite being in extreme pain for such a long period of time, and he always retained his sense of humour and love of life right until the end. My mother always noted how he never complained. He's my hero.

Today, I communicate with my father on a regular basis, and he is helping me through my current situation by telling me that regardless of the outcome it will be OK. I firmly believe it's the spirit and motivation of my family and others that have completely filled me with a new level of love and hope -  something that is hard for me to describe but it’s there and it’s strong. I’ve always been a spiritual person since childhood but what I’ve experienced recently is something truly special and beyond what I have ever known before this.

This past weekend we were in Stratford attending the play "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" with the kids and our great friends the Barbours, who have four kids of their own. What an amazing weekend we had with Jim, Carrie, and their incredible kids! On the way back on Sunday morning, I was happy to be invited by our friends Anne-Marie, Tracey, Rob and Marian to the Grace Community Church. Shayne and I went, and very early on in the service, Pastor Todd asked the entire congregation to join together to pray for me. Linda, who was standing beside me, held me with her hands very tight to my heart. I trembled and my heart just raced as Pastor Todd asked for prayer, and was overwhelmed by the kindness and generosity of everyone. It was extremely emotional and a moment that I will never forget.

Since this all began, so many people who care have sent me their kinds thoughts and words, suggestions, ideas, links to articles and videos, books, stories about their loved ones and friends battling cancer, alternative cancer treatments, it just keeps going and going . . .

I just want you all to know how much I appreciate it and that I’ve been open to all of this and have in fact tried a good many of them along with lots of  reading and watching of videos. We learned a great lesson just over four years ago when we moved to Guelph from Toronto that being open to new things and ideas can open up a new world and the move here ended up being the best thing we’ve ever done (aside from having our kids)!

Throughout this journey, we’ve been so impressed by our health care system and all of the amazing individuals we’ve come across. People like the receptionist at the Imaging Centre of Guelph General Hospital, and how she happened to hear about my heart issue and started asking me about screening of my sister and kids. She was going way beyond what I was there for and I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was genuinely concerned and really cared about me.

Each time I see my family doctor, Dr. C, and nurse K, I can feel their compassion and concern. It feels much more than a patient-doctor relationship. I feel as if they are going through this with me. I feel lucky to be in their good hands, trust them 100%, and want to thank them for all they have done for me so far.

The staff at Grand River Hospital and Grand River Regional Cancer Centre have also been so amazing, every single one of them, and we have been impressed by how they have done things efficiently and “on the fly” starting with my quick and urgent start of radiation treatments last week to alleviate my obvious back pain. Thank you to everyone there!

Philanthropist and former co-CEO of RIM / BlackBerry Jim Balsillie and wife Heidi donated $5 million and raised more than $44 million for local hospitals for major redevelopment projects, including the Grand River Regional Cancer Centre. The Balsillie’s donation was the largest gift ever made to health care in the region. When you go through something like this and are able to take advantage of a world class facility like this Cancer Centre and it’s amazing staff, it really makes you appreciate the kindness and generosity of those who go out of their way to contribute to such worthy causes in helping others.

Today is Thursday, November 17, 2016, and I now have two days of fasting where I can only drink water and have soup broth. It’s 9:30 am and I am very hungry, but I suppose I better get used to it!

I am scheduled to have both a Gastroscopy (examination of the upper digestive tract - esophagus, stomach and duodenum - using an endoscope - a tube with camera) and Colonoscopy tomorrow (Friday) and likely these two tests will be the final ones to determine the root cause of my cancer. Yesterday, I completed my 5th radiation treatment which was aimed at the spots/cancer that were found on my spine and in my bones and back.

We remain hopeful and I am appreciating every single day and ever thankful for my friends and family. I still have a lot to achieve, but in the immediate future, there are two things I want and need to do by the end of this year: arrange a music night at Manhattans and travel to Europe with my family.

Within the next week or so I am going to arrange a music night open mic with friends at Manhattan’s in Guelph. It will likely be a Sunday afternoon or evening early in the week and I plan to bring my drums, amplifiers, guitars, instruments and have a kind of open jam with friends going up and performing. I will let you all know!

The other thing that Kathryn and I have talked about is a trip to Croatia with our family between Christmas and New Years with a stop in Paris, France, a place that my 6-year old daughter Anika has dreamed of going. I want my kids to know my relatives in Croatia as I have known them from the time my parents took me there a young child and I can’t wait to take a photograph of Anika beside the Eiffel Tower!

I will be meeting with my oncologist in the middle of next week and will likely have more news as a result of my Gastroscopy and Colonoscopy tests on Friday.

My good friend Jamie Mitges, who is a world class musician and composer, composed a beautiful song for me the other day which he called “Love Life”. So, hug your kids and loved ones, breathe in the air, appreciate each moment – and love life!